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By Sarah Delaney
Contributing Writer

My boyfriend and I just finished off a lovely Sunday lunch and now as I sit with my full stomach, noticing that my shorts seem to feel at least a size too tight, I remember wistfully back to the times before I had met my boyfriend. Ah those stressful days when I would sit at home on a Saturday night eating PB and J while watching Sex and the City.

Before I met my honey, I would moan constantly about how much I hated being single and how much I wanted a BF of my own. Just ask all my girlfriends, co-workers and family, I am sure they remember too. It’s not that my life was incomplete; I quite liked being single, most of the time. The thing I disliked most was cooking for one and eating alone. I certainly didn’t mind dishes for one, or laundry for one or never having to pass over the remote ’cause there is just the one, but sitting and eating alone was a bummer.

That’s why when I finally met my Mr. Wonderful, I was anxious for us to get cooking. Mind you, I don’t actually cook. I make cold things. I can fix up a mean salad like nobody’s business and sandwiches better watch out ’cause I am good, but when it comes to cooking hot food, I am only so-so. All the better that the BF is such a wiz. He is one of those guys that can take whatever is in the fridge and make something that looks like it stepped out of Gourmet Magazine. Lucky, I know.

Or so I thought. We have been together about two years now and not only have I become a better cook, I have also become a better eater. And when I say “better” I don’t mean that I am healthier, I mean I can get more in my belly in a shorter amount of time than I used to. My stomach has actually become capable of eating much more food. How, you say. Let me explain.

The BF is much bigger than I am and he happens to be a boy. Just those two things alone make him need more calories than me on a daily basis. Add to that the fact that he rarely chooses tight fitting clothes and even in jeans I have never actually seen him turn around to look at his butt in the mirror so I am guessing he just doesn’t care as much as I do. When you put those four things together it adds up to, “he eats whatever he wants plus seconds and desert, exercises less than me and weighs exactly the same as he did when we met.” What that equation means for me is just too much food.

I know it is my own fault. If he jumped off a bridge, I wouldn’t jump off a bridge so why do I have to eat all the same things he does? I don’t. But it’s not just about what foods we are eating; it’s about how much of those foods we are eating. Because he has such a big plate of food, it makes my tiny plate of food seem even smaller. That’s why (subconsciously) I started compensating and my plate of food started to get a little bigger, and then a little bigger. It didn’t look that big in comparison. It still looked small so it must be small, right? Wrong. Over the past two years my tiny plate of food has grown and today at lunch I ate exactly the same amount as he did.

This has now officially become a problem. So we all know what Sarah is going to be working on this week and I urge you to look at your own food consumption too. I don’t just mean in relation to your partner either. What is the size of your plates? How many servings are you actually eating?

How much do you actually need and when are you actually full? Did you know that each year as we age we need fewer calories to sustain our weight? Scary, I know. Life just ain’t fair. Luckily I have some helpful tips for watching your portions. I am planning on doing all of these this week. Care to join me?

*Put your food on smaller plates. This little sleight of hand is sure to fool my brain into thinking I am eating more.
*Don’t look at your partners/roommates/child’s plate. Judge how much you want to eat before you look anywhere else. No comparisons unless it is to gain sympathy later. “I ate so much less than you and now I deserve a foot massage for my amazing act of willpower.”
*Have salad or vegetables with EVERYTHING. They are filling and healthy. Who cares that your sister’s steak was so much bigger than yours, you are just as full from your little filet and your ginormous salad. Take that age!
*Chew your food well. I mean chew like your mama taught you. (Was that just my mom?) Count to 25 with each bite. It will take longer to finish everything thereby making sure whoever is eating with you is finished by the time you are.
*Pay attention while you eat so that you don’t forget that you are eating and end up eating more.
A full list of portion sizes is on Web MD
www.webmd.com/diet/control-portion-size

If you happen to be a boy reading this article and you feel as if you can’t relate then you now have a responsibility to help us. It’s hard when you traipse around with your bags of chips, ice cream cones and candy bars. It’s not our fault we need less calories, nobody asked us if we wanted to be more fuel efficient, we were just made that way.

If you happen to be a man who is finding that he too is eating the same amount that he used to but now it’s adding some weight, then follow my tips above. You may miss having the metabolism of your youth, but just think of all the reasons you are happy to no longer be a teenager.

If you are happy with your portion control and think I have the willpower of a bee in a botanical garden then I salute you. Please do not look down upon me but help me and those of us like me who have found that as years pass, although my plates do not get any bigger, it seems that my butt has.

Be Good to your Body, it’s where you Live.

Sarah Delaney is a personal trainer at Millberry and leads the walking groups on Parnassus and Laurel Heights.